)PantyPirate's Recent Statuses
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Mon, 29-Jan-24 12:04 PM (86 days ago)
I brought a new pair of shoe's, but somethings wrong with them. When I tried them on, one of them isn't right 🤔
Sat, 27-Jan-24 11:43 PM (88 days ago)
I brought a book on abdominal pain but it was damaged, someone had removed the appendix 😕
Sat, 27-Jan-24 5:54 PM (88 days ago)
I always by lube whenever I buy a cucumber. It's better to be thought of as a weirdo than a vegetarian 😕
I think the movie is Room In Rome, a bi woman seduces another woman, it's late at night and they call room service and ask if they have a dildo. The guy says no but he can warm up a cucumber for them.
(88 days ago)
And you think I'm weird 🤣 how are you sexy girl? 😘
(88 days ago)
Saturnfinger1 likes this
Sat, 27-Jan-24 4:48 PM (88 days ago)
I started a new job today, it's making ok products in a satisfactory.
Thu, 25-Jan-24 9:16 PM (90 days ago)
I told my wife I've got a problem, she said no, we've got a problem, we're a team, a couple, a unit, your problem is my problem, I said ok, we got your sister pregnant...
Thu, 25-Jan-24 6:35 PM (90 days ago)
Why does drinking 8 pints of water in a day seem unfeasible, yet downing 8 pints of beer in a couple of hours seems reasonable 🤔
oh thank you sexy lenny 
looks delish, not tried the mandarin flavoured one
looks delish, not tried the mandarin flavoured one
(89 days ago)
We had a sign in my local pub, liquor in the front poker in the back.
(89 days ago)
a day rather than 9 pints of water....
Thu, 25-Jan-24 11:04 AM (90 days ago)
My girlfriend came into the bedroom in some new underwear, I said that looks nice, is it satin? She said no, I've only just put it on 😏
Mon, 22-Jan-24 4:04 PM (93 days ago)
I was thinking about giving up flashing, but I've decided to stick it out for one more year 😁
Sun, 21-Jan-24 9:01 PM (94 days ago)
Do you know why humans can't hear dog whistles? Because dogs can't whistle 🤷♂️
Sun, 21-Jan-24 11:39 AM (94 days ago)
I love putting on fresh, warm underwear, straight out the dryer 😊 it's also fun looking around the laundrette and guessing who it belongs too 🤣
Fri, 19-Jan-24 2:55 PM (96 days ago)
Right, I'm off out. I know it's still early, but I like to have 5 or 6 practice beers before I start drinking 👍
Mon, 15-Jan-24 7:49 PM (100 days ago)
I tried to take a picture of myself in the shower but it came out all blurry, apparently I have selfie steam issues 🙃
Sat, 13-Jan-24 7:04 PM (102 days ago)
I came, I saw, I forgot what I was doing, went back, got distracted, I have no idea whats going on, is this my coffee? I need to pee 😫
Sun, 7-Jan-24 7:06 PM (108 days ago)
Hey AGR did you get my e-mails over Christmas? Your so bad at replying, I don't know if you got them and haven't replied or you didn't get them 🤣
AdeleGingerRaine likes this
who? who? *looks under lurkers corners couch*
(112 days ago)
Hey there Arti, my gorgeous friend, smitten, its great to see you too, and AGR.....what can I say about you my beautiful friend, the pleasure is all mine 🥰😍😘
(111 days ago)
Thu, 11-May-23 1:21 PM (349 days ago)
What's the magic words to get what you want? "I'm offended"
AdeleGingerRaine likes this
Here I thought it was, "do you want to go shoping then on a vacation?
(349 days ago)
Thu, 11-May-23 2:19 PM (349 days ago)
Did you know, if you put you're foot down on the gas and the break pedal at the same time, you're car will take a screenshot.
Thu, 11-May-23 9:13 AM (349 days ago)
When the waitress finally came over she apologised for my wait, so I stormed out, it's non of her business if I'm fat.
Don't tell emu but I don't mind his bad jokes shhhh I don't want him to get a big head
(349 days ago)
They can add a little mirth on an otherwise gloomy day 😁
(349 days ago)
I totally agree mate definitely beats the I'm board ones could never work that one out lol
(349 days ago)
The nerve of her to talk about such a heavy topic at dinner.
(349 days ago)
PantyPirate likes this
Wed, 10-May-23 12:30 PM (350 days ago)
I asked how much it would cost to gather a singing group for my birthday, she said do you mean a choir? Ok how much to acquire a singing group for my birthday?
Tue, 9-May-23 6:28 PM (351 days ago)
I would consider polite and courteous, that if one of my statuses is deleted by a moderator, that I am at least informed of, why, and by whose request. I don't consider this unreasonable.
Tue, 9-May-23 6:03 PM (351 days ago)
Do you think if we renamed "brains" to "apps" people would start using them?
They'll need to rename brainiacs as brainiapps.
(351 days ago)
Mon, 8-May-23 9:31 PM (352 days ago)
Don't waste words on people who deserve your silence, sometimes the most powerful thing you can say is nothing at all.
This tactic is situational. Sometimes there is nothing you can say that will help. In that case why waste precious energy?
(351 days ago)
Mon, 8-May-23 9:49 AM (352 days ago)
Bad luck to the GBR Wheelchair team, narrowly missing out to France 49-55 in the final, it was a great run and a brilliant final but well done to now back to back European winners France.
Mon, 8-May-23 1:07 AM (353 days ago)
A book I wrote on poltergeist got published, apparently its flying off the shelves