So everything came to a screeching halt in the blink of an eye for me a month ago, 7/20/21 in Miles City MT at 11:38 am. My husband, been with for almost 23 years, since I was 18, died at the age of 41 in my 85 fox body mustang. He was ejected from the car and it rolled several times, caught on fire and then caught up with him and exploded. We would have been celebrating 20 years of being married on 08/18 but instead I was getting his name across my heart/till death do us part and the dates. We have 4 kiddos, 19, 17, 15 and 14, 3 boys and 1 girl. We were always together. He was my bff, provider, protector, love... We were open and even 23 years later the intensity of our sex and passion never decreased. I stayed strong for our kids and got them through the funeral and first weeks of losing their dad but I feel it is all catching up with me now. I don't have family besides them and feel more alone than I have ever been. I can't talk to others about it without feeling judged. So I decided why not get it out here. Nighttime is the hardest part of the day by far. I lay here all alone and can't get out of my head. Right now I'm feeling guilty because I am horny af and I don't want a relationship by any means but I do want to fuck like there is no tomorrow. What is wrong with me?? Idk ... 😞💔